Baltimore, MD Association of Sewing and Design Professionals conference

  Heading off to meet with colleagues, my fellow Board Members, and friends in Baltimore, MD for a few days of conference, meetings, and events. I'll share my personal experience on Instagram! (@shopthegarmentdistrict)

Fashion Unraveled Symposium... A mountain of things I haven't told you... second post

In October of 2018 I wrote this...

She started quietly, and very slowly, describing her visit to a seemingly completely normal place, and being directed towards a small, simple, and quite unremarkable white dresser.  Inside its drawers, she explained, long protected from dust and light, were the impeccably folded clothing items which had belonged to, and were sewn by Frida Kalho.

Frida Kalho (photo from Wikipedia - click link to see details)

Michelle McVicker presented "The Traces of Use, A Case Study of Appearances Can be Deceiving: The Dresses of Frida Kalho and the Potentiality of Visibly Worn Dress" See more about this here...

I was in.  Every word she spoke was fascinating to me, as she explained how signs of use and wear give garments a history, that pristine, unworn, or excessively "restored" garments cannot convey.  She talked about the word "patina", a concept usually reserved for durable antique items, but rarely used for signs of wear on clothing.

Now, in September of 2020, while I am no Frida Kahlo, I get it.

Cancer hit me like a cannonball.  Chemo, chemo-radiation, surgery, recovery... body changes.

I discovered a great use of my own skill.  Sewing for my own body changes and challenges.  Asymmetry, new needs...

I got this.

Fashion Unraveled Symposium... A mountain of things I haven't told you...

I don't want to exhaust you with this, but the symposium I attended this past Saturday set my creative and artisanal brain on ABSOLUTE fire.

Where do I even begin?

Okay, we all reach the creative point where we start to analyze why we do what we do.  Does it matter?  Is it silly or frivilous?  Why is this so important to me?

Maybe you bristle when you make something you feel is lovely (which, truth be told, is ALL that matters), and someone says something that indicates that they have missed the point entirely.  People are often impressed when I simplify an item I've made, by just stating that it was "custom made", and then, when they wanna know where to buy it, I reveal that I am the maker.  Then, I get the looks of "You must be crazy to make your own shoes!", or "Why aren't you doing this as a business?"

But, really, those are my own issues.  I do make things for people, lead tours, consult and source when I am the right person for the job, but this whole area of my life is so much bigger than that.  What i am beginning to tell you, could probably be a novel's worth of information, but I'll put it here, because I need to process and express it, even if it isn't widely read or commented on...  Sick with me, and I'll just add to this post in parts, until I'm done.  How long with that take?  I dunno.  Let's see....

As I work...

Making a dress... thinking, planning, cutting, fretting... I happened upon this on Netflix streaming...

A delightful watch so far...

"Urban superhero" aesthetic

A superhero name for my daughter? Let's call her "NatureGirl"

I'm making made a new dress for my teen.  Her aesthetic is very much "urban superhero", which is this wildly creative, strength-exuding way of dressing that is uniquely her own.  I have become so immersed in my own head that I forgot that the things I make are now unapologetically odd - happily, she embraces them wholeheartedly... thank God!

Thanks to a beautiful nature-themed knit panel from Elliott Berman, and a great purple twill from Rosen & Chadick (now making its second or third appearance since I've owned this yardage), this dress started to sing my daughter's name, and became her own!

Complete with a (required, at least in our lives) MetroCard and random stuff pocket and a tough, denim-like underdress, when worn with boots, this getup will be impervious to the rough NYC elements.

Update:  She wore it yesterday (bare-legged with ankle boots, and a leather jacket) - and loved it.

On fur, sweatshops, prison and unfair labor practices

Republishing: Original post January 29, 2013  How far have we come?

"The only things that do not change are dead things. Clothes are exceedingly vital and alive." 

-Jacques Worth, 1927

Which of these is this coat? Alive or dead?

And this leopard?

I have written many posts over the years on this very topic (see my old blog to follow the path this post will lead), trying to wrap my head around all of the complexities of treating people fairly, compensating them for their work, and consuming resources responsibly.  I know these things are important.  I know that people are passionate about these things. I know that everyone, every  single  person on the planet matters equally. I know that we need to take a good look at ourselves, how we fill our closets and bellies, and how we treat one another.

The caption of the original photo above, (from my family's collection) originally from TWA Aviation Press Pictures, reads, "NY International Airport, February 11, 1960. Glamourous Eva Gabor, who appreared on the Jack Parr Show last night, is pictured wearing a leopard coat prior to boarding a TWA Jetliner to Los Angeles where she will enjoy a brief visit."

The airport had not yet been renamed JFK, for obvious reasons... but notice the mention of the leopard coat? My, how times have changed.

Or... have they?

This coat would have been quite a status symbol in those days, but would now be a very unpopular item (to put it mildly), if worn by any celebrity. While such a coat, which once turned heads, now turns stomachs, are animal rights just the popular issue right now, due to the marketing efforts of groups like PETA? Does it matter that her coat was once an actual leopard?  Yes, it does.

This got me thinking (again).  We celebrate the person wearing the item, cooing and sighing as they float down the red carpet, as the TV correspondent breathlessly calls out, "Who are you wearing?" The name assigned to the garment is almost always a brand or a fashion icon, but what an interesting experiment it would be to try those interviews on the bustling streets of midtown Manhattan, or Boise, Idaho, or Phoenix, Arizona.  Would they know?  Would they care?  Would you? Do we?

I know there are always other fish to fry, but I want to specifically turn your attention to an article on sweatshop labor, offered by BBC News. Do we think about the human price paid when we buy $5 T-shirts? According to the article, workers in Burkina Faso would love to stop laboring for such low wages, but, unfortunately, cotton is their only cash crop.

I also noticed an article online this morning about Riker's Island inmates wanting to learn about fashion theory. This is said to be the most popular of the course offerings for the prison population's female inmates. Students also learn, as part of this course, about third-world sweatshops and fast-fashion retailers, in addition to exploring their own potential.

It seems that when we talk about making clothing, we inevitably end up talking about bigger issues as well.  Here in the US, we talk about outsourcing, and how low wages are being paid to foreign workers to keep our clothing prices low.  But we also talk about social consciousness and a more global perspective on how our decisions impact all of us.

Excerpted from a Times Style Section article on the same topic:

"Chyiome handbag designer and Project Runway alum Anna Lynett Moss teaches the class, which tackles cultural identity and design process by narrowing in on provocative style and design approaches. “People with creative training are in a unique position to envision innovative alternatives to some of our deepest social problems,” she explained to Of a Kind. The designer and humanitarian—she is developing a socially—conscious accessories line with the UN–chooses talking points that range from fashion shows to magazine spreads to educate and enlighten."

Read more: http://style.time.com/2013/01/23/rikers-islands-most-popular-class-fashion-theory/#ixzz2JNI8NIaF

Here's the kicker, on Facebook this morning, I was inspired to click on the face of a person I vaguely recognized from high school, who is connected to another friend from high school.  We weren't friends because we were in different grades and didn't hang out with the same groups of people, but I recognized her name, and noticed she had become an author.  Because we (my family) are avid readers, I clicked through the link to her book, and was just FLOORED... positively FLOORED by the "Jean's Story" section of her profile, and then downloaded the book to my Kindle immediately.   I hope you will click through to the link, but if you don't choose to, just know that she was actually going to the same high school I was every day, just after climbing out of miserable conditions, and assisting her mother in a Chinatown sweatshop. Her name is Jean Kwok, and a video of her discussing the (fiction) book can be found here.

So, I'm having one of those astounding "You mean, right here? In my lifetime?  My peers?" kinda moments.

Clothing.  Everyone gets dressed everyday.  But it symbolizes something far greater. Bigger stories can always be told surrounding the process that results in a wearable item. Heads are needed to design it, hands are needed to create it, and hearts are needed to appreciate and love it. In our Project Runway culture now, we should be more aware than ever what it takes to make our clothing.

So now, here's my bigger point... as you read this, "Who" are you wearing?  You pulled on a sweatshirt you randomly snatched up for a few bucks at a huge discount store.  Or maybe you made it yourself.  Or maybe a well known artist or designer made it. Could your clothing be made in a prison work program, a foreign work camp, a local sweatshop? Does it matter where it came from, and who made it? Yes.  Clearly it does. More than we realize.  And more than we are willing to admit.

Let's make something ourselves, shall we?  With our own hands, head, and heart.  Need to go fabric shopping?  I've got you covered.  If you want to find fun places to shop in the garment district, sharing the creative energy of a group, come along on a Speakeasy tour.

Why you should NOT create and/or design your own projects (To be followed by Why you SHOULD be a dressmaker)

Previous (related) post: Why you should create/design your own projects


Below is a post from my old blog, written in July 2011.

Trial by Fire (and Error)

Sometimes, despite your best intentions, things can go horribly wrong. Failed relationships, disappointments... make you wanna "make lemonade". That lemonade isn't always as sweet as you'd hoped.

On that particularly dismal trip to Hot-As-Heck, NC in the summer when I was 16, my mom distracted "my grandmother" (my own awkward name for her, since it never rolled off my tongue to call her "Grandma", or anything like that.) outside for a bit, my Dad pushed aside a large dresser to reveal a door in the front room that lead deeper into the house. Behind the dresser, in neatly appointed rooms covered by a thick layer of dust, lay the year 1965 or so. Furniture in conversational positions, and a lovely baby grand piano, showing signs that a real life had been lived here. Organized and bright, these lonely rooms had been untouched for at least a decade, I suspected. And the "kid's" rooms (my Dad and his brother) were just as they left them even longer ago. At times, my grandmother talked about her "kids" as if they were still boys, and her husband (my grandfather) who had died before I was born, as if he were still alive. My Dad showed me the rooms, whispering quietly, unemotionally, and factually about what each room represented for him. We tiptoed out, put the dresser back as it was, and pretended to be sitting quietly when she came back in.

Back to the present:

Wiped out after a dressmaking project that went wrong, I decided to work out my dissapointment with a personal project. Because I had used an expensive fabric from my personal stash (a luscious, black double silk organdy) as a lining to help "save" a dress that ultimately didn't work for a client, I decided to reclaim some of that fabric for a new dress, which I would name "Things we lost in the fire". My obsession with flame motifs led me to buy a lovely cotton emblazoned with a firey mix of reds and oranges, and apply it to a summer dress. Set against a smooth, jet-black cotton, I sketched and imagined until a creative frenzy sent me to the dress form to messily drape the design.



These approximate shapes gave me rough templates for cutting my pattern pieces...




I adjusted the pattern to my shape, cut the dress pieces, assembled the dress, and was pleased.



That is, until I put it on. Somehow, I had created what looked like a grandma's nightgown with flames. Hot flashes? Ode to menopause? Not what I was going for. Knowing I would never wear it, I resolved to find the version of this idea that I would/could wear. Okay, the silk organdy has no place on this dress, either. I wanted to place it as a bottom border, sorta giving the illusion that the fabric had been singed as the flames traveled up the dress. Okay, so I could see it in my head... but on the body? Just Terrible.



All of that to get to this. Black skirt, to be worn with a black tank and my favorite red wedge sandals. 




Now, if only I had a tattoo...

I still wear that skirt happily, four years later, on the HOTTEST days of the summer. 

Let the above be a lesson to ya, and if that's not deterrent enough,  here's why you SHOULD NEVER create or design your own projects:

You hate originality.  You are not a fan of looking any different, more creative, more fitted, or polished than anyone else.  You just want to blend in, and you want the same for your accessories and home decor items.

You have NO spare time at all.  Hey, know that 20 minutes you spent staring into space/glazing over/Facebook posting/contemplating the laundry?  Don't use that. That time doesn't count. There have been novelists who have written important work in their "spare" time, or by using stream of consciousness techniques, but seriously, they must have been superheroes, since we all know that isn't even possible. Right?

You can't find any stores that sell fabric you like or can afford in the garment district.  There are so many stores, and darn it, you've explored them all, which took WEEKS, actually.  All for naught, because... You loved NOTHING.

You have no new ideas, no old ideas, and NOTHING inspires you.

You feel NO satisfaction when you make something yourself.

You'd rather long for things you can't have.  Maybe you could make them... but who feels like trying?

Really don't...  Have I convinced you?

*This post was written with love (and intended humor!)

Next post on related topics: Why you should be a dressmaker (will be posted in the near future)

Things to inspire... things to share...

To inspire:

I think this movie may be a game-changer for the public interest in dressmaking.  Remember "Titanic" and the garment fantasies it inspired?  This movie, which gives 40 year-old Kate Winslet a 25 year-old love interest (Hemsworth) may do the trick.  No official US release date yet... but we'll be waiting!

And when you see it, I suggest you dress for the occasion! The description alone will kill ya...

In the 1950s, Myrtle "Tilly" Dunnage returns to her hometown, an Australian country town named Dungatar, to take care of her ill mother, Molly, from which she was sent away at the age of ten because of false accusations of murder. Tilly, an expert dressmaker trained by Madeleine Vionnet in Paris, transforms the locals with her couture creations and in the process, exacts revenge on the people who wrongly accused her of murder all those years ago.

Who can help you get the dreamy fabrics and tools this film will inspire you to use? Well, in the garment district, there are many, but the best of the best map will guide you in the right direction.

Also to inspire:

Here's a great article on dressing your body... or anyone else's for that matter.  It will inspire you, and make you feel the value of your work as a garment professional, hobbyist, or artist, wherever that lands you!

To share:

Now, food for thought... what kinds of things can become fabrics?  Should they be making fabric using discarded animal parts?  Hmmmm... If not, why not?  Talk amongst yourselves, people.

A quote from the article linked above:

...one kilogram of gelatin can yield one kilogram of wool. That 1:1 trash-to-apparel ratio puts the process on par with a Nike project that converts plastic bottles into a polyester thread used for soccer uniforms. Unlike Nike, though, Stark and his team will need to find a manufacturing partner who can help develop infrastructure to produce the new fibers at scale. Because the foodstuff is derived from animal by-products, and gets made in bulk, it’s a more cost-efficient material than the merino sheared from sheep one at a time. At present, though, the European companies who manufacture gelatin do so only for niche products like gel capsules and Jell-O.

Also to share:

Are you looking for sewing classes in New York City?  Here's a site with a list of options...


Now, take a deep breath, have a good stretch, and do something meaningful.  See you later!

Ancient inspiration

Note: The brick and mortar City Quilter has since closed...

I'm creating a garment that has no closures.  No buttons, no zips, and no fiddly mechanisms to manipulate. A garment designed and decorated with an appreciation for the people who will see it. Simple in structure, that can be passed down through generations. A garment that can be disassembled and reassembled for special laundering or repair, if desired, that can conform to a variety of body shapes. That can be equally elegant in "thin" or "fat" times... A garment that respects the body movements of the wearer, and offers some versatility regarding how it may be worn...

Oh wait, that already exists.  It is called the kimono. Incredibly practical.  Timeless in its beauty.  Insanely forgiving.

We are in a kimono phase right now in fashion, if you haven't noticed.  Google it, and you will see, fashion is all about the kimono right now. To make one, you need to know how to do it, but you do not need to know how to fit or alter, since the kimono requires neither.

If an American equivalent of the kimono were to exist, what would it look like?

Well, the fabric has to last.  Both the color(s) and the fabric itself need to endure.

My latest appreciation is for "yukata" cotton.  I was gifted this lovely piece of fabric by a friend of mine, who attended a Okan Arts trunk show at City Quilter.

To use it, I thought... I'll need to know what the characters mean, and which way is right side up and what is upside down...

So I asked my best friend to ask her dad to tell me what the fabric said.  And in his extremely thorough, wonderful way, he shared this...

From dad:

It is read "dai-naru-to" or "oh-naruto" in Japanese.   It means "great tidal whirl pool".大, dai = big.       ( 鳴, naru = ringing     戸, to = door. )鳴戶, naruto = 1. The eddy or whirlpool and its sound caused by the strong low tide and high                            tide hitting each other.                        2. (Not in this case)  The semicircular fish past on a wooden plate, kamaboko,                             which is rolled up white fish past and red fish past. When it is cross cut, the                             Intersection will show white and red whirl pool like a roll cake.                         3. A city at the north-east corner of Shikoku Island, facing Kobe and Osaka.                             A big bridge, "Oh-naruto bridge" connects it with the main island of Japan via                             an Island named Awaji-shima in between.Hence, Dainaruto or Oh-naruto may refer to the famous noisy great tidal eddy.Many tourists just go to the Oh-naruto Bridge, get off their vehicles, wait and watch the great tidal while pool.
Please note that the printed words on the top is looked from front, while the lower one is looked from back side.
By the way, do you know "yukata" means "bathing wear", by its words?However, in real life, it is evening wear, for both staying at home, or for out-going, or visiting, especially it is very comfortable during hot and muggy summer evening.
Is she going to make a yukata for herself?  If so, please remind her when she wears kimono, the right piece must be under the right piece.  Men and women wear kimono in the same way.Only the shrouds are worn left piece under right piece, men or women.  Some movies made in Taiwan once caused big laughter in Japan years ago, just because the female star was wearing kimono with the left piece close to her body under the right side, just like she wore Western style dress.

What a wonderful guy.  I love when people take this kind of time to explain.

Spare me the details...

* I love making/redesigning/altering things, and while I enjoy reading blogs that explore the making process in excruciating detail, here I'll simply share results/photos for inspiration, and guidance regarding where to buy the materials/instructions/supplies, when relevant.  If you have any specific questions regarding the HOW aspect of anything I show here, feel free to ask, and I'll answer!

After putting on her newly altered dress, she admired herself in the mirror... "Why don't they make dresses like this anymore?" she sighed.

The back of the pretty vintage dress.

Pictured above, is the back of a beautiful dress, owned by a vintage-loving client of mine, made of a dreamy metallic brocade.  Since it was made for a broader figure than hers, it needed to be altered it significantly to fit her figure, which I achieved by changing the seaming (adding a princess seams where there were none on the original dress), reshaping the bust and armholes, and added some side boning to give it a smoother look. My client will use it for a choral performance on Easter Sunday.

The dress itself, looks similar to the center view of the dress below, with a natural neckline, rather than the square neckline pictured.

This dress pattern, for sale on Patterns of the Past

The original dress was handmade, using two layers of fabric together as one.  There was no separate lining layer, and large seam allowances and perfectly pinked raw edges made this dress a dream to alter. The precisely cut organza layer had the perfect resilience and crispness to smoothly fortify the shape. 

"Well, THEY don't... but someone can!" I thought.  Fabrics & Fabrics has a particularly spectacular selection of brocades, and there, you can find a beautiful gold metallic brocade like this one, as well as wonderful organza to use as lining.

Now... let's say I were to make a similar dress for myself... all I need is a place to wear something that fabulous... Well, a girl can dream, can't she?

"Poiple Shoyt"

Ugh... this weather...

There needs to be a name for this season in clothing.  The thrill of winter has worn off, the "February blues/blahs" loom in the distance, and I want to simply cocoon myself, sip coffee, and design/sew wonderful stuff in my copious bursts of "free time" and "extra energy".

So, what do we call this weird stretch of winter? I know - I'll call it "Cruise".  Yeah, that's it. Then I'll pretend I'm going on one...

So, that's what I'm doing.  And... by the way, you might have noticed that I name everything.  Almost accidentally, really.  As I'm creating a garment, it decides it wants a name.  I can't stop it.  It just comes.  So, I introduce you to...

"The Poiple Shoyt"
("purple shirt", of course - but must be said in the accent of Bugs Bunny)

Maybe I can wear it on the cruise.

I felt the need to do a quick, messy drape on my form (literally a very rough, sloppy, drape), to create a shirt that would celebrate this cozy double-cloth knit fabric I bought from Elliott Berman in September.  One side is grape juice "poiple", the other side I would want to call call "Kool Aid chartreuse".  Funny thing is, the purple-ish color is much more midnight blue than "poiple", but I just can't stop calling it that.

Fabric from Elliott Berman Textiles - the layers are secured together at every "dot"

So, in a creative frenzy,  I draped a very messy muslin, skipped making a pattern entirely, cut the fabric directly, added a side seam invisible zip plan for less boxy shaping, drafted a sleeve, started the assembly...

Started doing weird things to it.  Yellow cord... festive buttons...

And how could I describe it?

Hmmm... Sorta artist's-smock-meets-Crayola-box-meets-kindergarten-teacher-meets-fun,-but-absolutely-not-sexy, -meets-not-for-grown-ups, with a bit of humor, well... that is...until I do hair, makeup and accessories, so you won't be able to tell whether I'm kidding or not...

But, as I was making it, something about it just didn't feel "right".

As I worked, something came over me, and I started to move more in the "clown" direction, but I liked that it also made me smile... even giggle a little.. so I went with it...

And then I added a tie. 

And here's a glimpse  of the (not ironed) result...

Perhaps it's simply an accidental subconscious homage to my favorite tie-wearing comedian, Paula Poundstone?

Interesting tidbit... she doesn't know how to tie a tie!

Wanna know more? After reading this...  

• Perhaps you are curious about the fabric store I mentioned, Elliott Berman?
• Perhaps you like humor in your clothing, too?
• Maybe you wanna see something else I've made? Funny things?  Weird things? Serious things?
• Maybe you want to fabric shop, too, but don't know where to go?
• Maybe you'll visit New York City, and wanna take a tour of the Garment District?
• Maybe you wanna learn how to sew? If not there, you can always go to FIT, or travel to Queens...

Click the relevant highlighted text for details...

Have fun!

The most interesting boy in the world...

The Dos Equis advertising guy...

Just before the holidays, my son became obsessed with some special pajamas he had designed in his head.  White camouflage flannel is what he wanted, but my garment district searches turned up nothing.

Shy, and prefers not to be photographed in his pajamas, which I respect.  He agreed to this photo, though.

He came with me on my next fabric search and chose this flannel Dalmatian print fabric in a small store with piles and piles and PILES of wildly inexpensive stuff... (a secret beyond the very "Speakeasiest") 

He loved it!  

I created his pajamas, with kimono-like sleeves and a soft, loose fit... and he loves them.  Because of their very mature, gentleman lounge-y appearance, when he wears them, we now feel compelled to refer to him as...

"The most interesting boy in the world."

After much consideration, I thought about adding the store where we bought this fabric to my garment district stores map, with an honorable mention, but since it is not in the garment district, and not otherwise findable, I changed my mind...

But, if you have a kid who likes to design, and might want to try his/her hand at making something themselves, Mood Fabrics is offering a FREE (yup, that's what I said) class for kids.  Follow this link for more info.

All is quiet

Things are awfully quiet in the district right now. This post is encouragement to put your money where your heart is...

Other than M&J Trimming and Mood, when was the last time you had to actually STAND ON LINE in a garment store?

Really, think about it...

Things are pretty quiet in the district these days.  Sure, many design businesses get their goods over the phone, online, and by sending assistants, gophers and interns to swatch, so when you shop nowadays, you've got a pretty good amount of elbow room in many of the district's best places.  If you read this blog, you already know where to go to find wonderful things!

We need these stores to stay in business and thrive.  We need them to continue to have great things for us to buy!

A recent Speakeasy participant told me that she used to sew long ago, but her interest was recently rekindled when she discovered that the things she truly would like to buy are not available in stores.  Tired of settling, she realized she could make things!

How about you?  I'm in a very creative moment right now, working to make beautiful things with fabric I've had for some time.  Here are some ideas that sing to me:

Roman shades!



Recovering an old chair/sofa!

 
Making a new dress - kinda inspired by this!

Using patterns and colors that delight!

Showcasing features, colors and textures that excite me personally!

My machine is humming... more later!

A Working Title

A few weeks ago, I spent a full week just thinking about the right buttons for a project, and then, a few days later, I spent full day on a hem.  

Really.

A hem.

*Ahem...

Not a huge, horsehair reinforced bridal hem, or a hand-rolled chiffon baby hem (which would explain that amount of time).  

No.

It is the hem of a relatively simple self-drafted blouse I started conceiving last year.  And this blouse isn't even for me.  It is part of an ensemble for an endlessly patient recipient, who knows I have been fighting through a professional and creative block for quite some time now.  Thank God I've known her all my life, so she understands, but of course, not fully... or she would tell me to just drop it, if it's too hard to complete.  She would just die if she knew how many hours in I am at this point. Frankly, I would refuse to drop it, anyway.

There are times when my hands simply won't move.  Times when turning on the sewing machine requires excessive preparation for me.  A deep internal pep talk, then deciding that I need a proper and wildly elaborate breakfast that includes a trip to the grocery store, then spending far too long scrubbing some unknown stain off of something that I've decided simply can't wait, all in an endless attempt to shut off the noise in my head so I can begin.  While my practical tasks are positively ON FIRE right now, many days, even that creative "beginning" never starts.

My brain is alive with far too many ideas right now.  I feel that I run the risk of exploding if I don't release them.   And this post is part of my exercise to find that release.  I am determined to find that release. My projects following this one are all lined up and ready to go, but somehow, the needle doesn't get threaded.  The scissors don't get touched. I have been wildly creative in our kitchen (and wow, has THAT been fun, and yummy...) and I've been intensely present and engaged for the Speakeasy tours, as well as in my writing, business life, sketching, pattern-making and conceiving.  My output has been enormous, but not my sewing output, the physical DOING of it, which feels like a clogged pipe. 

I know that this particular ensemble I'm making is uniquely beautiful.  It will be something really definitive in my life as a person who makes special articles of clothing. In fact, I am certain this particular ensemble is important work. My heart sighs as I see it develop.  I know I will feel as if I am parting with my firstborn when I turn it over to its owner.  I have to admit, I don't actually WANT to turn it over. I also know that if I were to keep it (in my size, of course) , it would simply hang in my closet, waiting for that occasion that never comes... and I do wish I could keep it for myself, but it really is specifically hers and only hers.  It looks like her.  It totally came alive on her in the fittings.  And yet, I'm fighting with my own hands to complete it. Every day, I swear to myself I'm almost finished, yet every day, I am not.  Sewing/creating/designing has long been my meditation and my joy, and the motivation to complete a project comes from something that isn't money or fear of the consequences of having an angry client, or any of the things that I would hope could just force me into action.  It comes from somewhere I can't even identify.  I've always been desperate not to become a temperamental artist-type, yet I'm scared that is exactly what I've become.

While I don't compare my talent to his, Charles James was rumored to have been difficult to rely on for completion of a garment.  While I do not use this information as an excuse to endlessly fuss over the details of a garment, I can certainly take comfort in the idea that there was at least one other person who could become obsessed with the minutiae and refuse to let go until satisfied with a garment's completion.  I will assume he often had to stop and wait for the creative muse to appear.

Creative people can often find themselves blocked.

I've been looking at other sources for creative inspiration, and the things I've found that resonate all seem to be shouting the same message to me right now.

A writer must write, a creator must create, and a craftsperson/designer must make/craft/design.  There is no other way.  Late last year, I tried to turn off my creative side, listen to my practical side, fall in line, and just march...  I thought I could do that.  Just to get a regular paycheck.  I was willing to just put on earplugs and march.  I sincerely was.  What I discovered, however, is that sometimes your ears have tuned into a certain frequency that is only your own, and your brain won't let you hear but one drummer.

I am no longer endlessly meandering down a creative path.  I can see that I am truly wed to a creative life, and I am finding my way.  The static on my internal radio will clear.  The cover of my own book is still a bit fuzzy, and I am squinting to make out the words. Now, my hands have to be on board too, please...

Some years ago, I had a wonderful client who commissioned me to make 4 jackets.  We had an instant rapport, and became actual friends throughout the process of our designing and finding textures and fabrics together.  Her classically English husband was an incredible motivator to me, keeping me on top of my game, as he would review the items, gently fondle the soft roll of her lapels, and offer his quiet approval as I shaped the cuffs, sleeves, and length of her jackets.  The garments were visually beautiful, but of course now, as I've matured in my craft, I can think of about a million ways I would/could have technically improved them, if I had the chance to reproduce them now.  She was an Academy Award winning movie maker/writer/producer, and we truly had a sincere respect for each other's talents.  I once asked her how she makes movies.  What an enormous undertaking. Does she see the movie in her head, or does she just start writing?  How does it all come together?  "Well, you do start with the writing, of course... " she said.  "But, above all else, you have to have a working title."

I guess that's not unlike anything, huh?  A garment, a career, a life plan... "a working title" is necessary.  I can't wait for the day my hands start responding.  I have to practice moving my hands until they can find pick up the rhythm again.  Starting RIGHT NOW.  And yes, I have already pushed the power button on my machine.

Now, if you'll excuse me...

Perpetual anything.... (Completely random thought...)

It only occurred to me last night (oddly enough, while driving), that my perpetual shirt idea need not be limited to the one shirt.  I can have a perpetual anything, as long as I make an appropriate patch for the item concerned.  

There will be a perpetual hoodie in my life this year.  

Now I'm moving into year two of wearing my shirt...

Based on history (as explained in my gambler's fallacy post), I guess it will be one more year before anyone else likes it!

Letters/numbers from Jonathan Embroidery, Velcro from Daytona Trimming.

Slightly wonky - it's been washed A LOT since!